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What Every ‘Hopeless Romantic” Needs to Know By Amy Michelle

Numeral Uno…..! Disney brainwashed us our whole lives!

All my life I’ve been the typical girl. Waiting for boy meets girl, girl falls in love with boy, girl and boys gets married and then comes the baby in the baby carriage. You know how the nursery rhyme goes.  I was nursing baby dolls until I was 12, had my wedding planned by 16 with all the flowers color coordinated with the season and my girls that I ate lunch with in 5th period were going to be my bridesmaid with coordinating hairstyles to match.  Did I mention I wasn’t sure who the groom was at the time? It was just easy to fill in the blank until further notice. I was ready for the big Cinderella dress and my Prince Charming to match!  Weren’t we all?

Fast forward ten years later, a number of relationships in the garbage, and here we are…

Yes We. Me and you Sistah. We are living our 30’s single and wondering what happened to all those promises life sprinkled us with when we were just babies. We were doomed from the start because these stupid guys breaking our hearts did not grow up watching the same movies we did. Didn’t they know we were waiting for them to grow up and rescue us from the wicked stepmother?

At least I know when I tried to make my sandbox crush marry me at recess, he would rather play with his friends or bugs. The similarities of the two always confused me. Guys aren’t designed to be like Walt Disney animated, the guys in the movies were always handsome and could sing, they knew that being a jerk wasn’t always the way to win the girl their heart skipped a beat for. I catch myself sitting down watching movies with my 12 year old daughter and I’ll have to stop myself from spoiling the scenes by telling her, “You sneak out this underwater cave if you want to and make a deal with a witch for some guy…I’m going to beat you!”

At least they got one thing right, you can wish to make someone fall in love with you.

Number 2!……. Love is real…real hard, real testy, but really worth it with the right person.

It doesn’t matter if you’ve been in love twice or twelve times, when you choose to love someone possibly more than you love yourself things start to become difficult. Maybe our feeling gets hurt because we expected perfection and flowers everyday but instead ended up with a farting toad and a trail of broken hearts. It’s easier to love a pair of Jessica Simpson’s than it is to lose the guy you’ve been dating for three months to propose. Unlike those damn Disney movies again, some love just doesn’t come out and hold a sign for you to tell you this is Mr. Right.

While I’m on the subject..

Number 3!! Every horoscope or Instagram quote is NOT a “sign” to be a thot

Call it a sign from above, a motivational Monday, whatever you want to call the reason your MCM (male crush Monday) has not clue you exist. Do you ever sit back and think about who actually comes up with these ridiculous quotes trying to help single women feel worse about themselves being single? Well I have! And to be honest a lot of these quotes don’t make any sense. You’ll see a beautiful picture of a happy couple on their wedding day with a quote saying “ If he don’t cook for you, he ain’t the one”.

Excuse me? Say what now? What does that have to do with a relationship, a real one at that.

You have to use common sense when it comes to dating, not signs from your social media timelines. It’s so easy to get caught up in the smell of new baes cologne during a first date. That doesn’t mean give in to everything you want immediately. Take time to learn him and learn yourself while being around him. You know that episode of Being Mary Jane when she was going to meet a date she was always weak for, before meeting him she made sure to “take care” of her “needs” before seeing him. Trust me it works. Not only will you be in a great mood but you’ll see things that you may have not noticed before.

Trust me.

Hopeless Realist Romantic,

Amy Michelle ❤️

Meet guest writer Amy Michelle:

amyMy goal in life is to help women cut through the bull when it comes to relationships. Relationships with ‘boos’, ‘baes’, boyfriends, husbands, families, kids and especially THEMSELVES. I cut through the black and white curtain of uncertainty to reveal the truth. There’s no grey area to be confused about because it takes so much away from the important things.

 

 

 

(Photo credit: Bitmoji App, Apple, IPhone)

(Reference: Disney, BET Being Mary Jane)

 

 

Happy You- Happy Family by Sasha Robinson

Being a single mom can make for a very hectic and constrained schedule, but I always put my girls first. The coin phrase in my home is “Mom, what are we eating tonight?” Dinner time is the special time of the day that is set aside for family.

So, one evening while strolling through Kroger, I passed the olive buffet table and noticed a pamphlet on the Mediterranean diet. Of course, the girls chose pizza that night, but I decided after flipping through this booklet in the checkout line to research further.

The Mediterranean diet originated from foods enjoyed in Greece, southern Italy, France, and Spain in the 1940s and 1950s. It consist of large quantities of fruits and vegetables, nuts, fish, and olive oil. The diet also allows for moderate dairy products, and moderate consumption of red wine and red meat. What stuck out to me about the diet is that it encourages us to enjoy meals with the family.

How many diets encourage us to do that ladies? Doesn’t it make it easier to stick with something when have someone doing it with you? It also promotes physical activity, which myself and my daughters do almost everyday.

While fruits and vegetables is the group in this diet that has the largest consumption, the use of olive oil is the one that promotes the most health benefits. Diabetes, high blood pressure, heart disease and breast cancer are all issues that are becoming increasingly prevalent within African Americans. Studies show that African Americans are 1.7% more likely to have diabetes than non-Hispanic whites.  Chances of acquiring these diseases are significantly lessened with this diet.

I have tried many diets before, but none of them have been as easy as this one. A diet that increases health and family time? It sounds like a winner to me. http://thegrio.com/2013/02/04/eat-cuisine-from-our-roots-for-better-health/

About Writer:

sashaLaSasha Robinson is an up and coming playwright and Christian Fiction author. Her first stage play “Angels on Assignment” is currently in production, and her first novel entitled “The Husband Tour” is currently being written. Her blog “Reads by Sasha” is an eclectic fusion of everything that embodies virtuous women. She currently resides in Louisville, KY with her two daughters.

http://www.readsbysasha.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/sasharobinson

http://www.instagram.com/justcallme_sashaa

 

 

Being a Strong Black Woman in 2017 by Nancy L. Collins

You speak your mind. You don’t hold back your feelings. Standing up for others, who cannot do it for themselves, is what drives you. Wearing your feelings on your shoulders is a “no, no.”

However with every chance that’s allowed, you take life by the horns! You have been given rotten peaches and sour cream. Yet you have turned it around for your good. Despite everything and everyone negative, that has come your way, somehow you made it all work for you!! Many people don’t understand you. It’s been a constant battle to defend yourself and/or your actions.

Nevertheless allow me to encourage you today. Keep being you!! There are enough people in the world who don’t stand up for anything! Everything gets a pass with them. Nothing ruffles their feathers. Don’t become like them. Your personality and strength is needed! You were created with and for a purpose.

People who may not be as strong as you, are awaiting your arrival. They need your passion & fire! They need to be pushed and encouraged in the right direction. If you stop being you, (it’s possible) that those person’s will never get to their next level in life.

Be you!! Be the Strong Black Woman whom you were created to be! Stop explaining yourself, to people who are not concerned about knowing you. After today, it’s no longer your problem if others don’t get you. Of course this is not a written permission to become unruly or hateful. Yet it is a permission to stand strong.

Understand this, being a Strong Black Woman will never be easy. You will be labeled as having a bad attitude, being a loud mouth, messy, angry, lonely, and every other negative thing you can think of. Most persons who give out those labels to Strong Black Women, are probably at a loss as to how to handle her.

Don’t hold it against them. Some men find it hard to date those type of women. While other men, find those types of women invigorating. Many days you may feel alone. The quantity of equal minded friends, may present itself as a challenge. Don’t throw in the towel. Keep being you. No matter how long it takes, the right persons will enter into your life and appreciate you.

You’re on the right path just for you. Trust and believe, they are plenty of other sisters traveling down the same road as you. Link up with those sisters. Build a network. Work on Friendships. Stand confident in who you are. Be unique. Be you. Be strong. For someone is waiting on the strength that lies in you!

 

Relationships 101 By Nancy Collins

Relationships today end quicker than a sew-in weave, at a beauty shop on a Friday night.  By the time you introduce your significant other to your best friend, the relationship is over.  You’re back on the dating website, he’s taking pictures with someone else and posting them on social media.  What could possibly go wrong, that causes people to end romantic relationships, before they even get started?  Well I believe there are a few reasons, as to why this happens to so many great women.

Before attempting to seriously date someone, here are a few steps that I think we should follow.

1)     FOLLOW YOUR GUT INSTICTS:  Do you get a weird feeling about the guy?  That’s your internal alarm telling you, to leave him alone!!!  Don’t sit around waiting for something spectacular to happen.  Get out of there.  Whatever it is about the guy, trust your instincts, it’s something you don’t need in your life.  Smile and move on.

2)     ASK QUESTIONS:  You’ll never find the answers, if you don’t ask questions.  When you’re thinking of being in a relationship with someone, you have every right to ask questions.  Ask the type of questions, which will require an in depth answer.  Not just a simple yes or no answer.  You don’t want to waste your time with a person, who’s not going in the same direction as you.  Side note: If he becomes upset at your questioning, you might want to run!

3)     PAY ATTENTION TO HIS ACTIONS: I always say “let observation be your friend.”  Don’t get so caught up in how attractive he is, what he drives, his position on the job, that you miss who he truly is.  Does he reach out to you on a consistent basis?  How does he treat the waiter/waitress at the restaurant, who may be a little nervous?  How does he treat his mother?  A person’s action will sometimes tell you more, than the answers he’s giving you.  Take the blindfold off, and pay attention!!

4)     KEEP YOUR HANDS TO YOURSELF:  When dating someone new, stop expecting them to “foot” the bill, for all of your expenses.  Were you a shopaholic, before becoming serious with him?  Was he paying your bills before he became, the official man in your life?  If you answered “NO!” to either one of those questions, then put your hands back in your pockets. 

Now let me be clear.  There’s nothing wrong with a man, wanting to spoil his lady.  As a matter of fact it is to be commended.  Also, if a guy is interested in the woman he’s dating, it’s okay to make her feel secure w/him (financially).  However, there’s a difference between a man wanting to do something financially for his woman, versus a woman who’s always in his pockets.  When a woman does that, it doesn’t prove whether or not if he’s a man.  Yet, it will prove that the woman is merely interested in his pockets. 

 Follow my blog at:  https://scarredforbeauty.wordpress.com/

Author Bio:

 Nancy L. CollinsNancy L. Collins is the owner and creator of Your Beauty w/NancyCollins285 aka YourBeauty285.  Under the umbrella of Your Beauty w/NancyCollins285, lies her Creative Ghostwriting business, blog posting, small business marketing, personal consulting, and two upcoming books (to be released in December 2017).  Nancy resides in Atlanta, Georgia with her two children. 

 

Why is Everybody Mad? By Selena Haskins

At least once a month, I shut off all media platforms so I can think, meditate and focus on getting important work done. In our society, taking a break to regain a sense of calm and peace is important. It’s easy to become inundated with the political, social, and economic debacles that affect our lives on a daily basis. Naturally, people are concerned about various matters and initiating dialogue through various media is a way to inspire change. However, the manner in which we communicate our concerns is not always palatable. In fact, people have become very angry about not only the things that have caused distress, but they’re mad about trivial subjects, opinions, and preferences.  

In our world, social media has become our main method of communication, and the platform is an open floodgate of angry debates. The saying, ‘some things are better left unsaid’ is no longer true. People have become loose cannons, exploding hateful words against other races, religions, genders, sexual orientation, and people with opposing political views. Whether you agree or disagree, it is easy to become a target of someone else’s anger.

Sadly, TV and radio have perpetuated the anger we see in some people today. Some people already have a short fuse caused by the stresses of life or simply because they like being angry for attention. Ratchet TV shows of women fighting and arguing with each other over a man while he’s sitting back eating popcorn, for example, have become the norm for some people to watch and engage in conversation about it. Public radio stations, some of which that are struggling to stay afloat with online radio stations, often invite listeners to call in and share their opinions. At times, this has only provoked more anger about the subject instead of encouraging callers to share what they think the solution to the problem would be.   

The news also sensationalizes tragic events that can make others sad or angry. There was a time when the news would report a shooting, but now they air the actual footage. These have triggered rage, and have caused racial wars.  

So, what can we do? We’ll always have various forms of media that’ll show the good and the bad of people. While we can’t control others we can control ourselves. If we know we’re sensitive about certain subjects it’s best to steer away from it. Yes, we must be informed about what’s going on around us, but we don’t have to engage in the news every day.

We can do our part by counteracting the negative angry behaviors of others by being positive. Why not share more stories that display the positivity of the human spirit, such as a fireman rescuing an elderly woman or a child with a physical disability winning the Special Olympics. Our coffee room talk doesn’t have to spark an angry debate; it can be filled with humor or the pleasantries that can motivate a good day.

 

About Selena Haskins

Selena-1058She is a native Washington who enjoys music, spirituality, basketball, and spending quality time with her family. As a young girl, Selena always had a vivid imagination, and would tell make-believe stories to her friends. As a teenager, Selena begin to journal her personal thoughts, and write poetry. Before long, her talent for writing was recognized by her high school English teacher, who encouraged her to write articles for the school newspaper. The articles motivated Selena to write many stories and essays, mostly as a hobby. After completing high school, Selena would major in English at Johnson C. Smith University, and the University of the District of Columbia

Website: http://www.booksbyselena.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/authorselena.haskins?ref=bookmarks

Twitter: https://twitter.com/BooksbySelena

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/booksbyselena/

 Book Purchase Links:

Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Selena-Haskins/e/B00BHYA3ZA/ref=sr_ntt_srch_lnk_1?qid=1496848792&sr=8-1

Barnes and Noble: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/s/selena+haskins?_requestid=421534

Autograph Copies: http://www.booksbyselena.com/

Introducing Contributor writer Selena Haskins

Maya’s Blog Showcase is pleased to introduce one of our newest monthly contributors Selena Haskins.  Read her Bio below and visit her website to learn more about her, read her blogs, and review her latest novels.  Follow her on social media to keep up with what is happening with her projects.   Selena’s first article will get you thinking about your self-awareness and the media.

Are you ready for some thought provoking articles that will empower and inspire you?     Welcome Selena Haskins.  Her bio is taken from her website at www.booksbyselena.com .

About Selena Haskins:

She is a native of Washington who enjoys music, spirituality, basketball, and spending quality time with her family. As a young girl, Selena always had a vivid imagination, and would tell make-believe stories to her friends. As a teenager, Selena begin to journal her personal thoughts, and write poetry.

Before long, her talent for writing was recognized by her high school English teacher, who encouraged her to write articles for the school newspaper. The articles motivated Selena to write many stories and essays, mostly as a hobby. After completing high school, Selena would major in English at Johnson C. Smith University, and the University of the District of Columbia.

Selena Haskins is the author of three bestselling books on Amazon: A River Moves Forward, Riding the Waves, and Just Between Us-Inspiring Stories by Women. Her latest novel, Yesterday Was a Long Time Ago was released May 30, 2017Her novels continues to explore the central theme of all of Selena’s books, namely, love and the power of forgiveness.

You are Too Far

 

Introducing Contributor Writer Nancy Collins

Maya’s Blog Showcase is pleased to introduce one of our newest monthly contributors Nancy Collins.  Read her Bio below and visit her website to check out her business.  Follow her on social media to keep up with what is happening with her and her book release in December 2017.  Nancy will be writing about relationships tips and motivation.

Get ready for some great articles that will guide you in your relationships and motivation to keep you positive.   Welcome Nancy Collins.

Bio – Nancy Collins (YourBeauty285)

Hello, my name is Nancy Collins.  Atlanta, Georgia is where I reside with my two children, and millions of others, who hate the never ending traffic, but love the warm weather.  I am the owner, & creator of Your Beauty w/NancyCollins285.  This company was founded with the purpose to push women to become greater, than who they were –yesterday!!!

We are not our mistakes!  We are not what others think of us!  We are not just someone’s sexual fantasy!  We are more than breast, hips, and thighs!  We are educators, mothers, entrepreneurs, counselors, and so much more!!  We make the world go around, at the perfect speed.

With my background in teaching pre-k, I am enthused to instruct other women, on how to be better!!  Today’s version of what a real woman is, has been corrupted by videos and old thinking.  I’m here to change that.

Under the umbrella of Your Beauty w/NancyCollins285 (aka YourBeauty285), lies my Creative Ghostwriting business, blog posting, small business marketing, personal consulting, and two upcoming books (to be released in December 2017).

Follow my blog at:  https://scarredforbeauty.wordpress.com/ 

Follow on Twitter at: https://twitter.com/NancyWrites4U

Follow on IG at : @yourbeauty285

Why are we Broke, Black People? By Toni Larue

“Dr. King organized the Poor People’s Campaign in 1968 to shut down Washington, D.C. and force legislators to tackle poverty. His efforts to shift focus from civil to silver rights were interrupted by his untimely death. He fought ardently for Black rights, but he also recognized financial literacy as the key to an America that was truly free for all people”. ~John Hope Bryant

Every Black family should invest in a family business. I believe in that statement and in fact I’ve been working on making it happen. I have several independent businesses that I own with my husband but wanted to widen the opportunities.

I reached out to my family and my husband’s side of the family and the discussion I had with them led to the following article. Why are Black people broke? I received a plethora of responses to why people think our community is lacking financial prosperity. I’m going to highlight a few of those claims:

Every generation starts from scratch: Some of us are lucky to enter the world with a financial head start. It could a be trust fund, a home, stocks and bonds, a large sum of money to invest, something that gives you an edge over the rest. Unfortunately, most Black generations are forced to start from scratch because the generations before us left us with nothing.

I stumbled across this article online called, African Americans Face Financial Challenges (2013), that proposed a reason it’s difficult for Black families to get ahead. “Family responsibilities weigh heavy in the African American community.

Some 40 percent of African American households are headed by women with no partner or spouse, compared to 26 percent of female-only heads of household in the general population. On top of that, 33 percent of African American households are financially supporting children and grandchildren younger than 18, and 9 percent are supporting parents or grandparents. In the general population, only 25 percent support children younger than 18 and 4 percent support parents or grandparents” (Phipps,2013)

Lacking Financial literacy: Before you think of building generational wealth one thing to pass down is financial literacy. What good would it do to pass down a fortune to someone who doesn’t understand how money works? They will only run through the wealth you’ve acquired, leaving the generation that follows, high and dry.

Fixed Income: A fixed income isn’t just associated with people who collect social security, disability, etc… Fixed income is correlated with receiving one income from one source. In order to build generational wealth, we must acquire various streams of income (that can be passed down). It is not enough depending on a job to provide you with overtime in order to increase your income. Never allow one person or employer to control whether or not your family eats. Be in control of your earnings.

Integration and not supporting Black Business: I wrote an article a while ago about integration being the demise of Black wealth. I believe that our need to assimilate has destroyed our need to support our own people.  Psychologically, there is a lot that we must work on as a community to understand why it is hard for us to support our own people but for now seek out some Black owned businesses and support them.

“One Generation Plants the Trees; another gets the shade”. ~Chinese Proverb

 References

Phipps, Jennie L. (May 21,2013). African Americans face financial challenges. Retrieved from http://www.bankrate.com/financing/retirement/African-americans-face-financial-challenges/

 Author bio:

Toni Larue

author-Toni-LarueToni has new novels out titled No Kissing that is available on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=Toni+larue+now+kissing

 

Photo Credits:  Multi-generational Wealth. Digital image. 4 Keys to Building Generation Wealth. October 26th, 2015. Web. April 17th, 2017.http://www.billionairebelief.com/4-keys-to-building-generational-wealth/

 

Your Patience is Key-By Charlotte Croom Martin

In a world filled with so much going on where do we find the time to have some patience? This is a question that a select few people are asking themselves. 

We can take a tour bus ride through New York City and see just how much patience is displayed. For example, we see a group of ladies trying to cross the street before the light turn red, but here is a taxi cab driver trying to make a turn at the same corner where the ladies are trying to cross the street. 

So where is the patience here I ask myself. Here is another senior you are in the checkout   line at Walmart and there are two customers ahead of you, they are smiling and talking to the cashier as they are making their purchase and then you say  out loud enough for them to hear, “can we speed up the talking some of us got to go to work.” Again, where is your patience?

In our everyday life, we can be busy at times but we should find some patience along the way at the right time. If we don’t know how to show patience, how do we expect for people to have patience when we just may need it? Here are just some of the places where your patience are needed; on the job when we are dealing with co-workers and our boss. 

At home, we especially need here because we are dealing with our front line important people in our lives. When the children need help with homework or projects that has a dead line. Another one is in our marriage sometimes partners do not always see eye to eye on every issue and we got to have patience that that partner will come around. 

Last is learning to have patience when you are asking God to help you get out of a mess that you put yourself into. Now you know you been in that thing for a while so be patience and wait for the answer from him. To many times we move before God on a situation and mess things up for ourselves.

In the Old Testament in the bible, God was patiently waiting for Israel to choose to obedience but they kept sinning in his face. God gave them ample opportunity to stop sinning and turn towards him but they didn’t so he withdraw his protection from them until they would cry out and return to him. 

So if God is still showing us patience and he is; therefore, let’s show patience for one another on the face of the Earth. With Holidays  approaching us we need to think about patience along the way. Many of us will be out hustling through the Malls and streets trying to buy this and that for our love ones. 

Take time to have patience while waiting in the long line at the grocery store or at the Mall. The truth of the matter is when you have patience and wait on certain things in your life you will get the right job or the right mate and not just any mate. 

Patience is key when we are operating with other people. Not only that but it makes a person feel good because you can display patience when others can’t. This world was not always in the fast pace lane but because of the technology today we want things when we want them and sometimes that is not good.

Sometimes it is good to let things come to you naturally not so much in a hurry. Where would we be if God did not have patience with us today? 

Sit back and think about your day, did you show patience today? What if your husband was not patience with you, wouldn’t you feel some kind of way? Or our boss if they never showed patience, you probably wouldn’t be working there much long.  

We are humans so we will make mistakes along the way. But we can try to do what is right and what we know is right to others. Maybe patience does not mean a thing to you and you care not to show patience. Well that is fine also but we hope nothing will ever happen to you where you will want someone to have patience with you. This is the thing if you are in the field of servicing, you need patience. 

Some jobs more than others need people to have patience. It only takes a few seconds to display patience to your brother or sister or even your neighbor. Just by you showing patience will make someone day especially if they are not having such of a good day.

Author’s Bio

Charlotte Croom Martin is a self-publish author in North Carolina. She works for one of the largest retail stores Walmart. She is known for her smile that brings you to smile. Her 2013 book “In The Stranger’s House” earned her air time on bctv. org as a guest for a topic called”Matters Of CONCERN”.

Social Media:

Charlotte M.  Croon M @AquaBrowneye  twitter

https://plus.google.com/+AuthoreesCharlotteCroom/posts

Authoress Charlotte Croom@facebook

Blog:

http://author44.blogspot.com/2015/07/which-road-is-right.html

Email:

wehecities@gmail.com

Are you given yourself a chance for change? by Shanikqa Canty

Here is a deep thought today, have you given yourself a chance to change?  Often times, we try to make ourselves comfortable in situation that we know are bound to change.    Maybe just the thought of being attached to “something” or “someone” makes life easier for some reason. But when you are on a journey of growth you will never be comfortable.

You can become content…YES! Every day we are growing and changing! And people, places, and opportunities that serve us no purpose can’t go with us. So, why are we holding on to these things that serve no purpose?

  I know it’s hard…some of us don’t like change…but sometimes change is a good thing. Why, change allows us to grow emotionally, physically, and spiritually.  I know that’s a saying a lot of us hear at times but it is true! I feel that if we don’t give ourselves room for change in our life.

 We aren’t really living. Life is about a journey of ever constant growing and moving forward. No need to become stuck where you are, especially if you aren’t operating in your hearts desires. Give yourself a chance for change to take place in your life! And I can guarantee you. You will love it! Be mindful of the changes but watch and see!!

Author Bio

shanikqaShanikqa N. Canty is a young 20+ year old originally from Brooklyn, New York and now resides in Orlando, Florida. Canty is a Amazon 2x Best Selling Author, Writer and Creative Clarity Coach. This past spring of 2016 God laid it on Shanikqa’s heart to become the Visionary Founder of the Success 4 Singles Network. Canty is also a certified life coach and public speaker through the American Union of NLP. Shanikqa’s passion is assuring men and women (young or old) to rise out of the ashes and to tell their story. 

https://www.amazon.com/Shanikqa-N.-Canty/e/B017FIE2IU/ref=sr_ntt_srch_lnk_1?qid=1489435900&sr=1-1

Facebook/BeEmpoweredWithShanikqa